Some people care what others think about them. They spend their time worrying about who’s saying or thinking negative things. Well I aint one of ’em. Sorry, but I just don’t care.
Actually, I’m not sorry. I just don’t care.
Why do we continually apologise for what and who we are?
While chatting with a friend the other day I experienced a moment of clarity. During our discussion we came up against a difference of opinion and instead of just voicing what I had to say I found myself almost apologising for it. As if I felt guilty for disagreeing with her.
What?! Seriously. What?!
Thinking back this seems to have been a running theme with me throughout my life. If ever I disagreed with anyone or held the opposite opinion to someone who was having their say I’d simply keep my mouth shut. Not wanting to make waves or set myself apart as being different. Never being the most confident person it was almost as if I was ashamed of my own opinions. Because surely if my opinions differed from someone else’s that meant they were right and I was wrong? But that’s all past tense because from now on I’ve drawn a line in the proverbial sand.
This isn’t going to be an arrogant rant about how much I don’t give a shit about your opinion; it’s merely a statement of fact. Everyone has different opinions. Mine might be different from yours and yours may be different from the next persons but I, we, shouldn’t have to apologise for this.
For those of you that have opinions which you stand by (whether they mesh with mine or not) then snaps to ya! I will listen, respect and accept what you have to say, just don’t be offended if I decide not to take it to heart, because I have my own set of rules to live by and they go a little something like this: In the nicest possible way I really don’t care what people think/say about me. Why should I? Anyone outside the immediate circle of my family and friends is completely inconsequential on the grand scale of my life. I flat out refuse to waste my worry on such things. And so should you.
I think good impressions are important and I would never knowingly be rude or impolite to anyone but I have come to learn that you win some, you loose some. You can’t go through life being everybody’s favourite. To do so you would have to be a thousand different people all at once and that’s a whole lot of ball juggling I’m just not interested in. It’s impossible to please all of the people all of the time. In the words of Katherine Hepburn: “If you always do what interests you at least one person is pleased.”
And it’s not just opinions. We should all be free to live the life we choose, without having to make excuses if other people don’t like it. I might be just like you. I might be nothing like you. The fact is it shouldn’t matter. I won’t apologise for not being Miss Popularity and only having a small group of friends. I won’t say sorry for being teetotal when all my friends like to drink. I won’t go out partying all night when all I want to do is stay home and read a book. I won’t make excuses for not being the most confident person out there. All these things make me who I am.
I refuse to apologise because I’m different to you. Making excuses for who you are is a slippery slope, and by the time your ass hits the bottom you don’t even recognise yourself. Well I say screw that.
So stop apologising. You’re entitled to an opinion; you’re entitled to your own beliefs. You have a right to your own hobbies and idiosyncrasies. It’s your prerogative be who you want to be. Stop making excuses just so other people can be more comfortable in your presence. If they can’t get over the fact that you are your own person then they are more than free to jog on.
I think it was Shakespeare who said you should “Love what you love without hesitation.” Well I’m gonna go one step further and say you should live how you live without apology. So go forth into the world and unleash YOUR INDIVIDUAL awesomeness.
By doing YOU and refusing to constantly justify who you are to others, you leave this session with Elle Woods style *snaps* and four of whatever Glenn Coco got. If you’re still apologising then sadly you leave with nothing. I would say sorry. But I’m really not.
*Steps off soap box and packs it neatly away.*